1) Winky died
2) The water pipe broke in the front yard and we had to pay to fix it
3) I got strep throat
4) Megan got the flu
5) Quinn has had a medical problem recently that isn't an internet thing to talk about.  We are 90% sure she is OK now, so don't worry.
6) Rusty is peeing blood all over the house
     a) Rusty is sick
     b) Our house is covered in blood
     c) Rusty needs to have $500 surgery next week after his $250 vet appointment yesterday
7) Quinn is screaming 75% of the time that she is awake and 95% of this time that I am home.  Screaming typically is accompanied by kicking and hitting.
8) They are getting rid of 400-600 people at work.  If I'm not one of them, I will probably still be re-organized to another job.
9) Megan isn't working (which causes her to feel stressed) and is trapped at home with Quinn all day (see 7)
10) I'm supposed to be 24 weeks pregnant, but I'm not.  I'm not pregnant at all.
11) I don't know if I want to be pregnant because Quinn is already more than we can handle.  I was trying to convince Megan to send her to daycare just so that she will GO AWAY for a while.  Ever since her illness (see 5), things have been worse.  Megan has been reading books.  I hope they help.
12) I have some sort of infection "down there".  I'm guessing it is a spin-off from my super antibiotics that I took for my strep (see 3).  I think maybe I have both a UTI and a vaginosis.  Neither is too bad.  Just a little weird feeling.  A little itchy.  A little burny.  I can't go to the doctor today because Quinn needs a nap and she hasn't had a good one in two days (long story, partially involving item 6c).  Going to cross my fingers, drink lots of water, buy some AZO and squirt hydrogen peroxide up my hoo hah*.
13) I'm so depressed and stressed out about everything that I am nearly nonfunctional.
14) I haven't had the time or ability to be there for anyone else.  I just checked and I have 943 unread blog posts.  I've had people at work mention that they saw Megan's post about this or that and I hadn't even read it.
15) Our washing machine is seemingly even more broken than it was before.  We had been able to get a load a day or so out of it.  Now it seems to always stop at the rinse and/or spin cycle.
16) I feel really pressured to buy a house now while interest rates are low and sellers and desperate, which means we need to get the basement dried up, the house painted, new faucets installed, oh and scrub the blood off of the walls (see 6b) so that we can sell THIS house.  I feel pretty sure that if we have our house on the market by the time people start getting rebate checks that someone will buy it.  Our neighborhood is one of the few where you can still get a house for under $100,000 and you still feel safe parking your car on the street.  That's why we bought here 6 years ago.  I feel like there has to be a mom with a few kids (500+300+300=1100) who would love to have a 3 bedroom house, with air conditioning, a fenced-in yard, carport and recently "finished" basement. FXFXFXFXFX
17) I'm sure I've forgotten things and will feel guilty about them.

Work beckons...

*Yeah, it does sound horrifying, but it is supposed to work at least as well as the clindamycin AND it doesn't kill the "good" bacteria. 

Edited - Remembered one. The battery is dead on one of our cars, so that's *really* why I can't go to the doc today.