...to forget my phone at work.  I came in to work this morning and saw that my phone was on my desk.  I hadn't even missed it.  The little light was flashing and so I thought that maybe Chris or Stacey had called for some din-din last night.  Other than Megan, really them calling for dinner is the only reason my phone rings.

I listened to the message and it was my Dad.  Grandma had a heart attack yesterday.  She was really bad.  No reason for me to go running down, but they just wanted me to know.

After playing phone tag,  (Ok, more like me repeatedly calling since mom doesn't know how to check her voice mail) I finally find out that she had the heart attack after dialysis yesterday and was in the ICU.  She was awake, but not ok.

I don't know whether to go down there to be there for mom (not grandma really) or if I would just be another body.  Since grandma is in the ICU, I don't think they let a bunch of people hang out next to the bed like they do with a regular room.

We are supposed to go up to Detroit this weekend to pick up some Very Special parcels from Cait's mom's freezer.  I hope we can still go.  Does that that make me an ass?  Is it a decision that I will regret?  I sort of feel that there's nothing I can do back home anyway but be there for other family members.  I might as well run this errand, right?  Aaahhhh  the guilt!

I think I will put off this decision.  Grandma has to go for another dialysis tomorrow and I guess they are giving her some blood at the same time.  Her hemoglobin was low.  Maybe we will know more, somehow, after this.

In other news, Quinn survived her first day of day care.  The moms survived it too.  She took three naps and drank the 15 ounces of milk we sent with her.  She played in the jumperoo and went for a car ride and a walk.  She was asleep when we got there, so I can't say that she looked particularly excited to see us (what with her eyes closed and all).  She looked remarkably the same as she did that morning.  I'm not sure what I was expecting, but...

Well, we took Quinn this morning for her first day of daycare.  Megan went with her yesterday and they hung out for a while, but she didn't get left.

I really thought I would be OK.  I mean, I already had my leaving the baby time a while back, but this morning Megan was so sad.  It just breaks my heart.  The stress of it all has had us being completely nasty to each other, too.  Joy.

I hate not being there to protect her.  Meadow is totally competent, but there are THREE kids against one adult.  Scary odds.  Especially when the one kid seems pretty hellbent on poking Quinn in the eye.  He's doing it in a friendly "I see you and am pointing at you" kind of way, but she doesn't really have a lot of defenses.

I wish I didn't have to work, so that I could stay home with Quinn and Megan could work on her dissertation.  Unfortunately that's completely impossible so we are all just going to have to get used to this.

Like Megan said when she was dropping me off this morning, 4:30 is a long way away.

This was a rough weekend with a lot of driving.  Ms Quinn is getting to be quite the traveler.  We went up to Canton (2 hours-ish) for a wedding shower on Saturday.  Yesterday we went down to Hamilton (another 2 hours-ish from home) to visit grandma.  Oh, I don't think I've updated you.  The day after she got checked in to the nursing home she "coded" and had to be rushed back to the hospital.  She was in moderate spirits, but very sleepy yesterday.  She really liked seeing Quinn.  She has surgery Saturday morning to have a temporary port put in for dialysis.  Today she goes for her first official treatment.  Hopefully getting all of the crud out of her bloodstream will make her feel a lot better.


In other news, beginning tomorrow, Quinn will be going 3 days a week to a care provider outside of our home.  The home care situation is perfect and she only has to go 3 days week, but it is still a big change for us.  It is especially big for Megan because she is the one who has gotten to stay home with her this summer.  If she's ever going to get that dissertation done, though, this has to happen.

Tomorrow is an "ease in" day.  I think Quinn is only going to stay half of the day.  Maybe until noon or so...

She's also been having some more real foods.  Here is a pic of her enjoying some avocado.  Somewhat messy, but she LOOOOVED it.



My milk supply is still very low.  Nursing her has remained pretty ok, but my pump amounts have gone down.  maybe I'll experiment with changing the membranes.  If that doesn't help, I'm not sure what else to do.